Ar Billy by Benny Wilkinson
Ar wish ar wor ar BILLY, -cos ar BILLY'S nearly ten
His gorra bag er marbles -en his gorra dog naimed Ben
Nar am not erloud tu play wi em -ar dar'nt gu throo bak gate
Cos mi mam ses am just sevon -bur am not am nearly eight.
Eee -ar sumtimes hate ar BILLY -his pinched mi trolley, tha knows
His gon en brok main wheel off -en God knows ar it goes
Hi sed it wer like it wen hi tuk it -bur it all'us went dead straight
But wot can yer se -wen yer seven -en am sure am nearly eight.
Ar wish ar wer ar BILLY -his full er fun en wit
His er grate shot wi er catapult -why av see'an him hit a nit
His all'us mekin fires int baks -en, at schoo'il his all'us late
Bur am sup'ooased tu bi on time -by, ar wish thet ar wer eight.
Ar BILLY draws bare women -ont bak et lavertry doo'er
En hi draws sum funny shapes er blokes -on mi granny's bedroo'm floo'er
Ad luv tu draw bare lasses -oh ar know it wud bi grate
Bur ar ca'nt cos am just seven -eee ar wish thet ar wer eight.
Ar wish ar wer ar BILLY -his aloud tu pick his noo'as
En hi rubs wor hi pulls darn it on uther peoples cloo'as
But wen ar start tu pick mi noo'as -it's er crack frum mam full weight Its becos am on'y seven -000 ar wish thet ar wer eight.
Ar BILLY kisses lasses -at bak et dustbin oil
En hi all 'us likes tu knock things off -like spice en pop en coyil
Ad luv tu kiss sum lasses -en pinch sum coyil fot grate
But its reight am on'y seven -En am sure al get tu eight.
Ar BILLY'S all'us ferst int bath -hi all'us likes tu win
Wen hi gets art, en ar ger in -thes er lot moo'er watter in
But one day ar will lick hi'm -Hill bi just that bit tu late
Bur it ca'nt bi warl am seven -it'al bi wen ar reach eight.
Ar BILLY'S very lucky -thet mi muther hed him ferst
Cos er gypsy towd mi muther -thet or ferst wud be the werst
Bur age es gor its compensashun -en ar BILLY'S just oreight
En just think, wen his one hundred -well arl bi nine'ty eight.
Denaby Neetmare by Benny Wilkinson
Us Mexborough lads were allus taught,
tu watch ah pee's an queues.
en niver gu through Denaby,
un-less we went in two's.
them words wer fruro mi Fatha,
en the made mi blood run cowd.
dunt mess abart et Denaby ses he
or thall not grow very owd.
Keep away and dunt go near,
they'll mek mince meat ah'ta thee.
Them Denaby lad's dunt mess abaght,
why, they'll eight thee for their tea.
ah used to wek up on a nete.
wi neetroares of that place,
en what they'd do to poor owd me.
cos a wer'nt a Denaby face.
Ah kept well away, ah used me loaf,
tu bi fair, well ah was scared.
av never bin a feightin man,
en tu their ways, not prepared.
et crossing gate ah used tu luk,
et that land of feightin men,
en yearned tu wander over thia,
en just be one o them.
En then wen ar grew up a bit,
paid a visit to that tuff town.
on't trackless rode wi heart in mouth,
en prayed it wudn't brek darn.
ah lucked thru winda worried stiff,
et the streets, en Pubs, en Shops.
en folk who (well) just lucked like me,
but ah got scared at the stops.
An then bi God it happened,
the bloody thing brok down.
en thea war mi, a Mexborough lad,
et the mercy of that town.
ar got off trackless artside Drum
mi face wer as white as snow
a gang o lads kern up to me,
en ah waited for furst blow.
What's up owd cock sed biggest one
tha dun't luk well tu me.
ah prayed hi wudn't ask me wee'ar wer frurn
ah wer sure ah wer goo'in to dee.
cum in't Drum en eva pint,
it'll put thee on thi feet.
tha'll eva laff in thee'a owd cock,
dunt tha know its Seturdee Neat.
The wer blokes in thee'a wi colly flower ears,
en sum es broad es doo'as.
the wer sum just singing songs of owd,
en sum in fancy cloo'as.
ah stud thee'a shekin from hee'ad to fut,
en in panic did rush for the doo'a
en then a big bloke collared me,
e ses, thas just trod on me too'a.
Hi picked me up like some rag doll
en ah thort -thes is it fer mi.
put irn darn, ses a voice in Denaby slang,
or tha can try thi luck wi me
finish the pint hi ses owd cock,
his manna did quell mi fear .
he's a Mexboro bloke, that's just ed thee
but his just ad too much beer.
Well that nete ah learnt mi lesson,
en a new mi father were rong.
for Denaby Folk er just like us
en a pleasure to be among.
na yer musnt tek em for granted,
for its true there feightin men.
But al tel this tha'll tek no harm,
if tha behaves thi sen.
Erroo'as by Benny Wilkinson
Bur ar du miss thi luv tha wer best -thert ever the's bee'an
So rest in thi pee'as lass -fer the's one thing fer sure
Sum day wee'l mee'rt wunce agean.
Am hi'er mi luv-ers usual
Just per'aps fer afe en hower
En al tell thi wor av brort thi
Its er roo'as -thi favorit flower.
The's er cowd wind -blowin up he'er lass
En winta erl bi he'er -any day
The's sum ortum lee'avs -layed on thi place
So al move em all away.
Nar dunt thi fret -abart mi lass
Tho am lone'ly -am or-eight
En thi owd hoo'am is nice en clee-an
Av made sure thert things er reight.
Oh -its heven -just tu sit pet
By thi side -well -fer er while
En dree'am er that day -long ago
When tha wun mi hart wi thi smile.
Well -nar av got tu bi goo'in luv
Cos them dark clouds er bringin int nete
Bur al lee'av thi er part er misen lass
Its er tee'er int roo'as -av layed et thi fee'at.
Written after seeing an old chap sat by a grave. I wonder if this was what he was thinking.
First Mistake by Benny Wilkinson
Ah rimember once when just a bairn
On't top er dustbin oil ad climbed
En when ar tried tu get bak darn
No safe way cud ar find.
Ar nearly scree'amd mi hee'ad off
After all ar wer just a bit of er lad
En furst bloke tu cum tu mi rescue
Wer Charley mi dear owd dad.
Dunt bi scared hi sharted up
His voice werked like er charm
Kee'ap thi nerve en dunt move abaght
En thall not tek any harm.
Cloo'as thi eyes en stand ont edge
Cos er jump fer thee's er must
Al stand darn hee'a en catch thi
For thi faa 'ther tha can trust.
Ar cloo'ased mi eyes en stood ont edge
Mi hart wer in er race
Ar luked darn et mi faa 'ther
En lept art intu space.
Cowd air rushed bi mi lug oils
Tu mi faa'ther's arms ar did glide
En just es ar wer hafe way darn
E just stud tu one side.
Ar nearly brok mi blinking neck
En ar new thet ad been truly had
Ses Charly thats thi ferst lessun in life ( owd cock)
TRUST NOBODY not even thi DAD.
Fred by Benny Wilkinson
Ah saw a mouse sat on some muck
On open ground he chanced his luck
Hi lucked en owd 'un, whiskas White
En didn't budge from ray of light.
Hi rubbed his noo'as en lucked et me
En spoke es human, yes! did he
"Dun't be freetened," he just sed.
" Am nowt burr a mouse, en mi name is Fred."
Ah lucked around en up en darn gate,
Maybe a trick from sum werkmate.
N o trace or sign or running tread.
Just me and lamp -en pit mouse Fred.
On back legs stood, he neatly bowed,
Sez Fred: "Owd cock, Am gerrin owd,
Mi legs ev gone! Am skin en boo'an
En that last fall es wrecked mi hoo'am.
" Av watched me kids feight over bread,
Lost em all, enough sed.
Lived in man-oils, coal and rock,
Always flit tin, mi owd cock.
Followed yore in search 0' grub,
Lost hafe me tail thru a runaway tub.
Laft at yore when yer've tried to tees
Mi frum mi oil wi a lump a chee'as.
Av'dodged them stoo'ans, thrown bi yore,
Clammed fer snap wi mates galore.
Lost mi missus -poor owd lass!
Just pegged art -too much gas.
Mi eye sight's gone en am none too sharp.
Es fer pinchin snap, av just lost art.
Nah fer mi matin', av lost mi zest
may es well admit it: am just a pest!
"Du me a faver -it's not a sin
Tek me up pit in thy snap tin.
Am redy for goo 'in, mi time is near,
Dun let me dee en bi buried darn heeah."
Ar picked im up gently but ar new hi were dead,
So ar tuk im in pit, mi pit mouse Fred.
Ar placed im in't garden, mid rose bush ser nete,
En ar rote on his gravestoo'an:
"Hi never saw dayleete."
George by Benny Wilkinson
I edn't seen George fer ages
Well it wer army days that's reight
So es be'in up hee'a in Conisborough
Ar thort ad luk up mi owd mate.
Ar went tu stree'at thet hi told mi
En ar nocks on doo'a numbur five
It wer an'serd wi er wuman er roor'in
Thru er tee'as shi bid mi inside.
Ar long is it since tha saw mi George
Ses shi wi er eyes bludy red
Cos tha's just cum et a bad time
His up stairs int coffin an dead.
Ar stud the'a all ashen en shekin
En mi thorts on poor George recollect
Ar ses if it's not tu much truble
Can ar gu up en pay mi respects.
Int coffin lay George like er statue H
is boo'its wer placed et its fut
On his eyes wer two ten pence pee'ases
It wer best way er keepin em shut.
Na'ar George frum me erd bin er borrow'a
En paying bak hi niver cud face
Ar tuk ten pence pee'ases off reight sharpish
En wi two pence pee'ases did place.
Ar went bak darn stairs tu his missis
Her face wer all wurried en tense
Can tha see any change in mi George, ses she
Ar ses ar, er-bart sixteen pence.