Bert Greensmith

Robin Hood Wor A Yorkshireman by Bert Greensmith

Av often wundered wen t'tales been told
Abart Robin Hood an is men of old
An ar the cem ta join im an is merry band
Wen t'word gor abart thar i cud do wi a 'and

But fowk oo tell t'tale ev gor it all wrong
An' t'words that ther singin, dooant fit reight wi t'song
A knaw fowk fra dahn theea'il sey "Rubbish, 'od thi gam"
But truth is Robin Hood ed nowt ta do wi Nottingham

E wor a Wakefield lad from t'Merry City
E'd an acre in Alverthorpe off DeWarren - oo ed na pity
Cos DeWarren owned land fer many miles round
An t'poor fowk ed ta pay im rent fer a bit on is ground

Nah t'fowk fra Nottingham 'll find this a bitter pill
Wen ya tell em owd Robin lived at Newton Hill
An afta DeWarren ed squeezed im abart dry
E thowt "A'll go an work for missen, A s'll etta try

Ya knaw i them days t'Manor o Wakefield wor t'bigist I t'land
Its greenwoods went - well not reight inta Nottingham but very gain 'and
So Robin tuk is ook inta t'Outwoods, weear DeWarren unted boar
An 'e pinched brass frum t'tich an gi sum on it ta t'poor

At 'Top at Wood'* e let on a big fella crossin Bushy Beck
E sez "Tha nooan crossin theear till tha pays me, by heck..
It's thee that pins t'cattle wen t'fowks cum ter tahn
Na tha'd better pay up "George a Green" ~ cum on afe a crahn"

An t'merry pinder o Wakefield sez "Tha gerrin nowt off me
An if tha puts one foot on this bridge tha'll get one i t'ee"
So the fowt fer an 'our - kickin, bitin an scratchin
Till Robin sed "Wo, lets giv ovva, Av ed enuff a this fratchin

Why dunt ta cum an join uz an ferget thi Pinderfields - cum on,
Tha'il bi welcum in t'band an we'll call thi little John"
Ya knaw we've got Robin Hood village an Robin Hood brig
An Kirklees Priory i Mirfield weear e wor bled like a pig

T'owd Prioress did im in, an she wor a relative ya knaw
So bi wary ov 'elp from yet sister-in-law
Yer'll bi thinkin "E knaws sum stuff" well ther's no misteree
Ya can go an read it fer yersen in Wakefield's History

* Note from the author: 'Top at Wood ' is Kirkhamgate (Top at Outwoods)

T'Holly Puddin by Bert Greensmith

A et too much a this puddin' last Christmas
A got stumack ache fit ter bring tears
A thowt A'd better nip rahnd ter see t'doctor
It wor t'fust time A'd seen 'im in years

'E sez " Tha seems t'ev poisoned thi sisten 'owd lad
An' it cud even move rahnd ter yer 'eart"
A sed "By gum, it sahnds bad fer mi, wot can A do"
'E sez "Fust off we'll 'ave all yer teeth aht"

A sez "Yer doant mean all on 'em d'ya"
"Aye" 'e sez "Ivry last one while tha'r able"
A thowt wey 'e means well dust lad an A suppose it's fert best
So A tuk 'em aht an' pur 'em ont table